Johnny Cash:
The guy owns your soul.
He was singing about blowing people away when 'How Much Is That Doggy In The Window' was at number 1 in the US.
That's like The Sex Pistols releasing 'God Raped The Queen'.
I'm going to start listening to Pig Destroyer just so I can be one of those old guys that stands at the back of gigs with a thousand yard stare that says 'You can never, no matter what happens, be as fucking pimp as I have spent the last twenty years being.'
I realize that I have just contradicted myself, but a girl can dream...
I mean boy...
I mean man...
I mean bloke...
Blokey bloke bloke, ooh the wife the car the football DIY mortgages Carling The Sun David Cameron fucking hell I wish either I or everyone else was dead.
I stole jokes from Bill Bailey and Tommy Gill for this post, in that order. I'm not sorry. In case you're wondering, they were the jokes you didn't think were very funny.
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